Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
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