Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
I deserve this hangover.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
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