Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I just was on a 20min team conference call where I didn't speak, I used a Gus Johnson soundboard online to answer questions asked to me...the highlight of 2010
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
