I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Randomize