Uh i was pretty wasted sat, so if i was weird it wasnt me. It was just vodka bein weird w my phone
Tonite tequila might call you
Be prepared
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
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