Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I just used my 7th grade year book to figure out who I hooked up with last night. Being home is magical.
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Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
We were all drunk for the whole flight. Steve doesn't even remember the cab ride to the airport. At 6am. Says he "blacked back in" at security.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
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U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
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