Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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