Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
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