Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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