so my mom just told me that she wouldnt pick me up and take us to taco bell at 3AM...
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
2016 is coming through for me, I'm renaming it the year of great dick
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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