There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
so my daughter wakes me up this morning and i feel like a vibration so im thinking she has my phone..nope my vibrator
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
