i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
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This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
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bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
She's licking the vodka she spilled off the desk
Aaaaand now she's drinking it out of the shot glass like a cat
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