Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
