Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
