I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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