i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
wow wtf my bar tab was 80 dollars
IT WAS DOLLAR BEER NIGHT
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
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