Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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