So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Randomize
