I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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