The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Then you guys just all showered together...?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
