These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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