Where are you?
In a non slutty way
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
