That's when you crack a 10am beer
I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
