the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
