Have you finally orgasmed yet?
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
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