he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
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