i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Randomize
