I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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