i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
My summer fucks are coming back to haunt me with a vengeance.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I just had to explain why I ate a whole quart of mac and cheese before 8am. Not a good start to the day
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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