two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Im covered in coffee vomit and urine and none of which are mine
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
Randomize
