I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
We talked him into tasing himself.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
