I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
Somehow i instagrammed my acceptance letter while blacked out. Then my grandma was the first to comment on it. I got over 50 likes....Phd here I come....
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Randomize