You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Randomize
