guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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