I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
You sprinted into the side of a parked car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
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