she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
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