no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
Randomize
