He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
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we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
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Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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