Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I have fence marks all over my body
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize