i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
It's 6 am and I've spent the last few hours searching for a cork screw or suitable substitute. You had none. Incidentally, I finally opened this bottle of wine, but owe you a new meat sticky thing with those two prongs. Sobriety is not good for me. Or your utensils.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Randomize
