I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
