Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
25 People Confess What They Really Think When They See An Obese Person
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
21 Disappointing Confessions From Teenage Fathers
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Can you not touch my dick while I'm holding a gecko?
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.