so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
It started with drunk jenga and ended with me simultaneously peeing and puking on his feet in the tub while he held me up. I met Tequila. I don't like her.
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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