Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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