god i wish i could take a shit and a shower at the same time
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Did I really make a PSA to that garage party that you wanted to bang him?
You gave a whole fucking speech. It was inspiring.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
