You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
