I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
No ambien sex tonight. I just ate two hotdogs with chilli and onions.
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Couch. On fire.
I missed you last night. I'm sure he will never forget the night i sang my heart will go on into his penis like a microphone
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
