I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
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