yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
I need a sticker that says "It's no use hitting on me - I'm the plus one" Seriously, how do they think I got in in the 1st place?
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
