Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
