i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
Randomize
